Randall to Arrive Shortly...Bring Out The Gatorade and Headbands, Morin Says

Morin, quarterback for the first place Face Punchers and seen in the photo, has recently reported that his lady friend of four years will arrive this wednesday. Ms. Randall, seen here cheering her team, has been out of town all summer. Insiders say she was out of town for medical conditions not known to the public. By the looks of her, a breast or ass reduction was possible.

Morin, who was found shopping for candles, extra headbands and Gatorade by the bulk, was quoted as saying, " Yeah, she's coming back all right...she has no idea what's in store for her...first, I'm starting with the skittle spit, then I'll move on to the shocker, a move I've been perfecting all summer with my Columbian neighbor. After that, it's all downhill from there. She won't know what hit her".

As a veteran of the fine art of masterbation, Morin is throwing in the cum towel and tying on the strap-on. "You see, when you're as small as me, you gotta wear a strap-on", he continued, "I wear a black one...and just in case you were wondering...it's true what they say about black guys."

Good luck Morin.